....

I've been pretty down..only occasionally. I mean for these two days.

My new phone...it's still ok but just by lacking of one compartment, I feel like very disappointed with what I have done. I shouldn't have lend the phone to her. Haih~~~ Now I feel like everyone blame me.

One compartment gone, and I tried not to scold her and talked to her nicely. About the charger, she blamed me for not giving her the charger but when i sms her, she did not reply me. And when she called me, I was in the class and when I called her back, she did not pick up. and her reason was that she was busy. Ooo..she's the only one busy and everyone else in the whole world very free is't? I did not scold her or anything and yet she blamed me? She's in DENIAL and PROJECTION!!!

When I told my brother that I need to look for that compartment and yet did not tell that it was because I borrowed it to someone, he straight away said that I was careless and I SHOULD LIVE IN POVERTY. He cursed me. Maybe he regretted giving the phone to me. He could've told me he did not want to give me the phone then.

He claimed that he is a pretty holy guy who knows Buddhism more than the rest of us. But does he know that there is a thing called KARMA? What goes around turns around and what goes up will come down. If I were to work outstation even if it is in Singapore, I'll stay maybe an hour away from his place. I do not wish to be cursed any further.

I'm down because everyone seems to put all the blame on me just because the phone is with me now and in my hand. I've been running and running and running away from this blaming society and beliefs in my house and I've tried not to blame anyone but what happens is that I get the blame when I don't blame. But I do not intend to blame anyone.

Maybe the phone was with Ping and she might not have realised it because when she got it, she was in a rush and she was even scolding the photostating shop assistant. She wouldn't have realised that the compartment was lost. This things happen when things are in a rush and I know that she was busy with the Microsoft thing. Therefore I do not blame her. Yet, it was such a small thing and even if I blamed her, there is nothing that she could do.

Argh..just focus on studies la. Damn it. Speachless..