Fatigue Again~

I'm tired. This week, particularly. Tues & Wedns especially. Argh...can't deal with too many sessions at one time. The result of procrastination.....this is what I get. Fatigue. It's marathon sessions but not with the same clients, just myself and JJ. Lolz..we still hav a long way to go in this. hmm...

Sessions

Is this a Karmic incident or just another day in my life that happens without a reason?

I met with the counsellor.

He hasn't helped much.

I still need to see him.

Although I do my best on my part to help myself.

All the best to my therapeutic session.

Hell of A Week!

Comparison of Eating Behavior Between Emotional Eater and Non-Emotional Eater among Obese Students In UNIMAS.

That's the title for my Final Year Project Research. At first, I was really confident of doing this reserach as I thought that UNIMAS would've had records of height and weight of the students but sadly, NO!!! There's not even a population of obese or overweight people. That, I can understand but NO HEIGHT AND WEIGHT?? Oh gosh!

Anyway, it would've been nice if they had the reports and I could actually access the faculties using the names that I have gotten and everything. Because of that, I'm using convenient samples. Lolz. Really convenient but sometimes, when the person looks like an obese person to you, they are just overweight. I bet when he or especially she sees the title of my research, he or she might hurt deep down inside cos most of obese or overweight people have really low self-esteem.

I do salute those who have high self-esteem because they are proud to be who they are. Even I, the one who has a normal weight, is not satisfied with my look. I guess that's the part where I need real improvement.

My questionnaires arrived only last week which I have received on last Tuesday afternoon 4.45pm. I went to have it photocopied together with my cover page and my other questionnaires. The next day, I had to look for respondents. But I was too busy that Wednesday cos I was pissed off! On Thursday, I had some time to look for respondents and I only managed to get around 9. It was quite an amazing number for the first day! After that, I had another like 10 on Friday cos I was busy myself in the evening with an individual counselling session. On Saturday, which I consider is still TODAY, hehe...I found another 11 which made my research samples to be complete which totalled up to be 30! I'm so darn happy! I'm not sure if this population represents the obese students in unimas because we don't have the population of obese students but I think it's about enough because it's really hard to find a person who's obese. Did I mention my presentation for chap 4 n 5 is next Tuesday MORNING?

Overall, I only had 2 rejections and about 4 of my subjects are just overweight. I'll do the analysis and send them their copy of result. I hope with that, it would be able to help them understand their eating behaviours.

I'm really into this weight thing. I love it. Even though I'm not an obese or overweight person, I think I'm able to understand because I'm also a big eater who loves to eat A LOT! Just because I practice restrain eating doesn't mean I hate food. Lolz! In fact, I love them very dearly. Just resisting the temptations.

Both JJ and My eyes were blinded and we cannot tell anymore the overweight from the obese. I guess Fabby the Babi is overweight. Lolz.

Anyone who needs counselling, can look for me. My service is free of charge! Love yáll!

So Pissed Off

I had a really bad headache on Monday. It was bad until I couldn't stand it anymore and couldn't really talk or even listen to noises. What's more, I was in a class meeting discussion about the convention we're supposed to organize this coming April. After the meeting, I went straight to the doctor and the first thing they checked was my blood pressure. Thank goodness for my healthy lifestyle, my blood pressure level was normal.

But now, I think it has reached the threshold level and about to burst. Probably from the coffee I took. MAYBE. Or maybe it's because of the fact that I'm very and really really really disappointed with my teammates. Some were given my trust and did not appreciate it at all! We're doing this mini-research thingy and there are 4 people in our team. I as the leader, am really pissed off.

Thank you very much for your cooperation and try to make my life miserable as you don't have the responsibility to make our assignments good because you don't have to pass up and say "hey, I used to be a dean's list and now i'm in the hell list of fame!!" Or maybe you don't want to get good grades and pass this subject, huh? UNIMAS is very comfortable that you don't feel like leaving?

3 chapters on my own in two days time, huh? Hahahahaha...beware of the ZOmBie!! I'm gonna getcha!! I'm gonna getcha!! I'm gonna getcha good~~!!!

Dead Lines

It's funny how life is full with dead lines even when we do not really know when we are gonna be dead.

I'm too laid back, I need a counsellor!

Final Year Project (FYP)!!! The due date is around the corner and YET my questionnaire is still in the air! It's flying its way here and will only reach in 2 weeks. Oh my GOODNESS!!! I'm so dead. It's not that I don't wanna start on anything, it's just that I'm stuck. All I can do now is to wait, look for my respondents and wait.

My cross-cultural assignment....just the report. Too relax because I have no idea how to deal with my groupmates. They are productive but lacking of initiative.

My mini-research!! Can someone be our freaking participant?? AnYONE from a company? My goodness! Why is it like that?

p/s: i'm not depressed. I'm just stressed out because I'm too laid back. Does that even make any sense to you?

Rain after the Sunshine

"Sunshine after the rain" is the title for my bro's blog. Why do I blog with a title opposite to what he said?

I think it's really sad how all of us have to succumb to the new environment of hell
Which was once a haven with its own standard
Being teared down little by little by the unknown
and unknowing
New faces setting up new rules
Pretending to know the best.

THAT's the main problem
You don't know anything at all
Setting up those rules and making our life difficult
I did not sign up for this
We were not taught to adhere to all this when we first came
This is not the standard that we were taught to adjust to
WE WERE TAUGHT TO HAVE HIGHER STANDARDS THAN THIS
AND MORE ORGANIZED
How do you expect us to lower our standards after being disciplined to adhere to better standards and see all the bad sides of these lower standards that you're putting up?

All you do is have meetings
Well, after all you're not the ones having to face the consequences
WE ARE!
Once you say something,
WE, of the HIGHER STANDARDS could already predict what could happen!
It's because WE of the HIGHER STANDARDS were taught to evaluate accurately
You guys should know better than we do
Or is it because you guys have been in the education line for too darn long that you have forgotten how the world is really like?
And once again PRETENDING to be the all-knowing just because you had the experience like when? 8 years ago? Or never?

This is why rains after sunshine like the weather in Kuching now is a bad Karma (whatever karma means to you).

Rain drop keeps falling on my head

Rain drop keeps falling on my head
And I didn't know what's turning in my head
Nothing seems to make sense
Oh raindrop keeps falling on my head and it's falling..

Yea, I screwed with the song.
I'm really confused and enraged and sad and everything.
Probably from the coffee I had earlier *extra rich*

A lot of things have been going on and I'm now troubled by:
Where I should go for my internship and organizational orientation?
Should I continue my non-promising tuition job?
Will I be making money out of the "promising" home-based money making program if I join?
What about all the assignments that I should be working on?
My final year project, my mini research, my editor part which seems to be really free right now since there's nothing to be done and I know that the head of this whole convention thing is thinking that my department should be doing something since everyone seems so busy at this time. But as usual, he's got his own prob to think about and I don't hope for him to understand. What about my mid-term exam tmr? I better get back to it.

See you guys in a long while. DArn!!!

And I wanna complain that I have had it with my lecturers!!!!